Your Lack Of Confidence Is Keeping You Stuck and Broke.

LETS GOOOO!!!!!

I'm excited on Adult Talk today, because I've started off  my day with none other than Motivational Guru Eric Thomas aka "ET" and he has me on fire!

If you could imagine for a second, a small, petite, 5'2 ft woman standing on her bed screaming at the top of her lungs "KNOWLEDGE IS THE NEW CURRENCY!!!!"

Well that was me this morning.(smile). You see, once again I believe that life is simple if you choose to see it that way. I actually believe that thoughts become things. I believe in the power of repetition along with the power of attraction. But here is the funny thing, we "repeat" things all the time, and most of the time we don't even realize it.

BUT WE GET EXACTLY WHAT WE WISH FOR! AND WHAT YOU CONSTANTLY REPEAT

So, you have to ask yourself.... are you repeating things that keep you happy, motivated, inspired?

or

Are you saying things that keep you STUCK.....MISERABLE...OR UNHAPPY?

Here is a simple test to see which side is actually winning....

Ready?!!

LOOK AT YOUR LIFE!

simple.....

LOOK AT YOUR LIFE!

Now which one is it? Now you certainly don't have to tell me, but you do need to be honest with yourself. Let me be transparent here.For years I felt stuck, unhappy, upset, and confused and I blamed my circumstances and situation and everything around me, and of course I saw logic in it,but here is a little unknown secret....

IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW LOGICAL SOMETHING IS....BLAMING THINGS OUTSIDE OF YOURSELF WILL KEEP YOU STUCK!

IT TAKES AWAY YOUR POWER!

Life is full of challenges and obstacles, but they are necessary to hep assist you in your expected outcome.Let me share some of my personal story with you before we really dive into days topic

 Your Lack Of Confidence Is Keeping You  Stuck and Broke

Growing up in a small tight knit community, I was blessed to have friends and family that seemed to accept me for simply being myself, so growing up in my adolescent years I didn't face certain challenges that a lot of people faced when it came to being myself.

For the most part, I had a pretty decent child hood, and even as a teenager I had a lot of fun. I believe it was because I was affirmed by my parents, family and friends. I danced, I cheered, I sang in the choir and I did those things that I wanted to do, and I didn't concern myself with failing or the outcome of it.

I WAS TOTALLY OBLIVIOUS TO THE IDEA OF FAILING.... 

and so because failure was never an OPTION  to begin with, I never "EXPECTED" it.

My confidence had not yet been tested at this point in my life so I was a very self assured young lady, and  frankly its easy to believe in yourself if everything around you affirms you, but what happens when you are no longer affirmed?

What happens to your confidence when thats never been your experience or it changes? (Lets talk about this later in the blog)

So I left home at the age of 19, to pursue my new life, I was full of hopes and dreams, like so many young people who leave their parents home. So may things I wanted to do with my life. So many things that were expected from those that loved me.

WOW!

so I made a simple plan.....

MY PLANS WERE TO BE HAPPY, RICH AND SUCCESSFUL!!

lol.....

and then.....

REALITY!

NONE OF THAT HAPPENED IN MY ONE YEAR PLAN(LOL)

\Why? What was wrong? 

It was supposed o be easy for me. I mean, everything else was easy for me. Everything I tried I excelled in, but this was different.

 It was called LIFE!

You see, for the first time in my life I was meeting different people, people that didn't look like me, think like me, or perceive life in the same manner and I loved that, but what I didn't plan on was that life was to be taken a little bit more serious now, and I wasn't really prepared.

I admired my new friends and was even intrigued by their stories of growing up, and frankly most of their stories had to do with hardship, challenges and obstacles that I had not yet faced in my life.

But they had this level of "earthiness" that I was enamored by. They had this"grit" that I wanted. It was this level of understanding of who they were that I had not experienced yet.
\
Why was I so attracted to them?

It was their CONFIDENCE,but not just simple, shallow, meaningless confidence. This confidence was attached to something. Something real, and meaningful, it was attached to overcoming challenges, and heartbreak, and the harshness of life. My friends, colleagues , neighbors and associates had already begun to experience life on a different level than myself, and I was intrigued.

They had already experienced the trials and winds and harshness of life, but its what built their  resolve.  So here it was on my 21st birthday, I was so excited about life. I had a  a real adult relationship, my own car, job and apartment  but I wasn't

HAPPY.... SUCCESSFUL....or RICH (LOL) so I knew that I had to keep striving.

 See, I  believed that if I got the(1) money, the (2)success would come, then I would be (3)happy!

What can I say, I told you that I was 21(smile). I didn't understand the formula of how life should work out, and because I didn't fully understand that I had it all backwards it affected me over the next several years of my life. I became  more and more disconnected,and because I was out of order(money...success...happiness) I met life with one failure after another. 

I failed so often, that I expected failure!

 I WAS NEVER SATISFIED.

Failed businesses, failed ideas, failed relationships. Every attempt was one BIG ZERO!!! and frankly I stopped believing in myself.


My confidence had been in the ring with life., and LIFE WAS BEATING MY TAIL!

Until one day around 24 years old I was introduced to a book called "THINK AND GROW RICH" by Napoleon Hill . A young man who was commissioned by Andrew Carnegie who was the wealthiest Man in America at that time (over 70 years ago) to dedicate his life to the study of the wealthiest and most successful people in America, The culmination of his twenty year study produced the book that all Inspirational and Motivational Speakers have adopted in their arsenal.

I wanted to share Dr. Hill briefly because this book is what started me on the right track , and led me to meeting the man who is responsible for introducing me to a world that that I had never known.

It taught me Principles that went on to change my life forever(will share in upcoming blog)

Did I become rich? 

No.

I got something even better.. I became RICH WITH IDEAS.

And that certainly made me happy.

I created my own school of thought.... 

IDEAS AND KNOWLEDGE COMBINED WITH CONSISTENT ACTION PRODUCE EXPECTED RESULTS.

I became a student of this way of thinking. Though it took years to refine, my confidence grew not because it was easy, but because I understood that if you work any principle consistently over time you will get the result you desire.  So instead of focusing on money, I focused on what made me happy. I got rid of any thoughts of others opinions and strictly focused on my passions, my purpose and how I can best use those things to serve others.

When you do the things you love, and those things that are in congruence with your passions and purpose you are building a pathway to your very own DESTINY!!!

YOUR CONFIDENCE GROWS AS A RESULT..

YOU BECOME BIGGER....BETTER.....MORE POWERFUL.

Your movement provides momentum, and you are no longer stuck. When you continue to act on what is purposeful, the money will find its way to you.Hear me clearly, it may not happen today, tomorrow or in the next 5 or 10 years but you must be prepared to look at several areas of your life. I today I will just share three.

1.Committment- How committed are you to the process? 1 year, 3 years, 5 years, 20?
2. Sacrifice- What are you willing to sacrifice? Time? Money? Relationships? Fun? Your Present?
3. Confidence-What are you confident in? Yourself? Your skills? Your talents? Your gifts?

Look at these questions and be honest with yourself. I suggested earlier in the title of today's blog that  Your lack of confidence is keeping you stuck and broke, and its simple because money and opportunity will never come to those who don't believe in themselves.

This may sound like a spiritual concept and that's because it is. Can people who don't believe make money? Yes....

But to get true fulfillment, happiness, success and RICHES and keep them you must believe in who you are so that that the flow of wealth and opportunity continue to find you. I know this for myself. Iknow that principles work if applied by whoever chooses to participate. 

You have to be willing to trust what you know is true and trust the process.

Remember when I told you that Napoleon Hill's book introduced me to a new way of thinking when I was just 24 years old? Well it led me to follow one of the best Inspirational Speakers in Modern History by the name of Les Brown. This man opened up places in my mind that I never dreamed possible, and I made a vow that I would one day meet him and he would be my mentor. I didn't know how or when but I knew that it would happen, because I BELIEVED DEEP IN MY SOUL BECAUSE IT WAS MY LIFE'S MISSION TO DO SO.

I listened to him for countless hours over 20 years, and he is the reason I speak the way that I do today with so much heart and passion. It's his voice that I hear before I get on stage. Its his voice that I hear when I've been met with the impossible. It's his vice that has made me GET UP!!!

At the age of 72 he is still HUNGRY!!!!

and at the tender age of 45 so am I!!!

You can't imagine how I felt recently when that day finally came. The day that Mr. Les Brown himself . That day he had a conversation with me.....and when he said my name tears tolled down my cheeks. 

FINALLY....

The day that was already set in motion from day one. The day that was set in motion when realizing my purpose of inspiring others and sharing knowledge and information to empower. For the years my gifts were being put in the trial by fire..... 

THAT DAY MADE IT ALL WORTH IT.

He started very simply by saying.....

"Kimberly you are absolutely beautiful, and  your energy is  delightful".

as he continued to speak to me, and ask me questions, and give me insight and advice, I couldn't help but express my gratitude for who he has meant to me, and the gift hehas given me.

He finished the conversation with......

"Kim...I want you to do 5 things for me tonight, and call me as soon as you are through. "

Well everyone.... I did those five things, and you just have to wait on the rest, but in the meantime I want you to listen to my mentor. The man who got me from being STUCK and lacking confidence because of life's circumstances.... 

NOW I COMMAND MONEY AND OPPORTUNITY BECAUSE I KNOW THE PURPOSE OF MY LIFE AND I STAND IN THE FULLNESS OF IT.

ITS YOUR TIME....

You are amazing, and deserving, and its time to step into it. Master it. own it. Now WIN!

To email Life Coach Kimberly Arrington and learn about her products, services and memberships please Email here. to find out more about Kimberly Arrington please visit. I Am Kimberly Arrington

Please tell me how you felt about today's blog. Don't forget to like....comment ...share and SUBSCRIBE!! Community coming soon.

Check out the amazing  radio interview I had on Simply IB with Mr. Ruben West . 

IF YOU BUILD IT THEY WILL COME

Is Social Media Breaking Up Relationships?

Wassup family!

WELCOME TO ADULT TALK WITH INSPIRATIONAL BEAUTY!

Depending on when you're reading this, let me start off this thing right!

Here.....WE.....GO........

Happy Motivational Monday!  Happy Thoughtful Tuesday.... Happy Wise Wednesday! Happy Thankful Thursday! Happy FREAKY FRIDAYYYYY!

I think I covered it. (smile)

Ok...I know you are excited about today's blog because of the topic, and I must admit that I can't wait to share it with you.

So if this is your first time with me, I want to introduce you to some of my rituals. Do't worry, I promise I will ease you into it(smile).I usually  start my day off with a nice cup of "Joe", or tea, or even a a nice expresso.

I usually work out, pray, and listen to something that calms or even moves my soul.

So right now, I am sitting at my desk, and looking out the window. while listening to the beautiful songstress Anita Baker. Whew.... her music never gets old. You feel me? I know you do. I never thought that I would say this, for the sake of not sounding old, but I have to.....

THEY DON"T MAKE MUSIC LIKE THAT ANYMORE! :-)

Let me  qualify this statement. I'm not saying we don't have great artist out there, but lets be real, things are a little "microwavable" in music right now. I prefer a slower smoother taste in everything that I do. That's just me, and I love smooth melodies, and consistent grooves.

It hits the PROVERBIAL SPOT if you know what I mean.

So,,,anyway I don't want to be selfish, let me share a little Anita Baker with you right now. Ok I will stop singing right now at THE TOP OF MY LUNGS!!

I will be back in a sec....enjoy a little Anita Baker while I step outside to get the mail....:-)

I swear THIS POWER BILL NEVER GOES DOWN...ooh Ulta is having a sale!

Ummm... Forgive me...Im speaking out loud again!

OH... just want to remind you that if you did not get a chance to check out my interview right here in #ADULTTALKWITHIB with the beautiful the beautiful Nicole Grays Owens, Check it out.

Please check out the first part of our interview. It was delicious.  Trust me 'I'm saving the second part of our interview with good reason..... I cant wait for you to hear  how I responded in THE HOT SEAT!!

I really enjoyed speaking with this Amazing young lady. Shes not only beautiful, but she has such a warm spirit and loves people, and works hard to live her life to the fullest.  Nikko also handles her business.

 I must say you should never judge a book by its cover. you will miss out on a lot of great people when doing that.

It is so easy to judge people by first glance. I'm not saying its right or wrong, but its definitely misleading, and so I wanted to talk about something today that is causing problems in a lot of relationships as well as marriages today.

I put out the question through social media, and it was something like this....

Do you think that its Inappropriate  to like someone of the opposite sex pics on social media if you are married or in a relationship?.

LETS GET TO IT.

As you can imagine, there were soooo many responses, but what was even more surprising was the difference in opinion. Some answers were short and to the point, while others were a it more thought out and complex.

As I read through each answer I became a little more informed and even more enlightened on how people feel abuot something that most relationships are dealing with right now. 

I saw responses like...

 "Social Media" kills relationships!"

"A relationship must have trust, and there has to be a clear line of communication and respect, and liking someones pic is not cause to be alarmed. 

I must say that I agree with both. Now of course assuming that there are different variables in every relationship, but of course my school of thought is very simple.

A relationship should be between two mature adults that respect one another, while communicating their wants, and  desires as well as what pains them to their partner.

Simple?

In theory!

You see, before we ever get the the idea that social media or the internet breaks up relationships we must visit the relationship itself.If your relationship is already fractured and is vulnerable I must say that taking to social media and talking with the opposite sex can cause a major problem, especially if your mate doesn't know this person.

I am not suggesting that men and  women cannot be friends, I think that's unrealistic, and also not healthy. But lets take a good hard look at this.

So I'm going to pose two different  questions for a healthy relationship first.

1. Can Social Media break up a Healthy Marriage or Relationship?

 No. The answer is No, because healthy shows that there are a couple of things that this relationship already has. It has two partners who are stable in who they are as individuals.They are able to effectively communicate. They understand that "likes" do not equate to wanting to leave them and hook up with this new person. In the event that it becomes an issue, they will address it and move on. This type of relationship has honesty and mutual respect.

2. Do you think that its Inappropriate  to like someone of the opposite sex pics on social media if you are married or in a relationship?.

No....Once again in a healthy loving and mutually respected relationship, simply liking the picture isn't enough to hurt this type of relationship long term. They understand that people are there for business as well as other things, but that is where respect comes in.

People are on social media for many reasons, but we all are here to be noticed by others for one reason or another. 

I will use myself as an example. I am a Writer, a Coach, a Personality, and I use it to connect to my audience, my clients and those who need inspiration, empowerment and motivation. I use my"likeness" to get noticed by both sexes to get out my message. 

YOU ARE MORE POWERFUL THAN YOU COULD EVER IMAGINE

ITS NOT TO PICK UP A MAN......

But I would be beside myself if I didn't speak to the majority of relationships and how its truly causing serious problems for a lot of people.

I'm just going to say it and point out the obvious. First of all,  there are a lot of relationships 'that involve one or more insecure people within the relationship, so that is already a recipe for disaster when you involve a powder keg like"social media".

WHY?

It its the easiest way and simplest way to get noticed by the opposite sex. When you are starving in your relationship, there are a couple of million people to validate you in the click of a button.

Now before, you start saying tha'ts shallow, and all of that, lets really not judge folks yet.  

We all have felt unappreciated or underappreciated in our lives at times,even in relationships, and getting that first "LIKE" is intoxicating. It's a feeling that we chase over and over and over if we are not careful, and being married or being in a relationship doesn't always curb that if you are feeling like the one you're with no longer sees you.

Sometimes you believe they no longer see you as interesting, or sexy, or compliment you, and those on social media will give that to you.

And.....Yes.... it makes you feel good.

But over time it can hurt and damage a relationship where a person is now getting their needs met for affection, and adoration outside of the relationship. That is a problem. Social media is not the cause, but it can help lead to the end if you are not careful with how you handle what's really going on.

Remember, what you hide will GROW!!! 

You have to constantly feed the monster.

Relationships are already delicate at times, and it cant always handle all the attention from others even if its positive,if you are not prepared for it. 

I MUST ADMIT THE LOVE FROM SOCIAL MEDIA PROVIDES A HIGH!

I'm speaking from experience, but I am also not married or in a committed relationship at this time. So things are a little different for me, but one thing rings true. Whether single or committed, put social media n a "box". The people are real, but they are not real in your life. 

We have to separate whats real, and whats not.

My advice to all of you is to not allow whats a fantasy to mess up what's real.

So lets look at the pros and cons and see what some of the responses were by some of you that responded.... 

"Beauty is Beauty....So if your husband buys fords but looks at a Camaro's is that disrespectful?"Mia

" I would try to avoid liking one persons pics too much, because it can seem disrespectful to my wife." Malcolm

"I like anyone's pics, it doesn't matter to me, because my husband and I are not insecure. Now if they are half naked that is another story." Marquetta

Share your thoughts on what You just heard from myself and from some of you. Look out for more on this topic  this week.. also if you want to know HOW TO KEEP YOUR PARTNER INTERESTED please check out previous blog 

Please comment, share and SUBSCRIBE to blog with your email.


This week will have a continuation of

HOW TO KEEP YOUR PARTNER INTERESTED.

To leave private comments or questions for #ADULTTALKWITHIB or #ASKIB, please email  here. To learn more about Kimberly Arrington and her products, services, and offers please visit. I AM KIMBERLY ARRINGTON to catch her live radio broadcasts please subscribe here SimplyIb