How To Keep Your Partner Interested
Adult Talk With Inspirational Beauty
It is a BEAUTIFUL MORNING!!
As I sit here at my desk this morning writing to you, I'm sipping on a lukewarm cup of coffee.0(ughhhhh Actually I hate "lukewarm" anything, but when I'm writing,I get engrossed in the moment, and it never fails....what started off "piping" hot ends up becoming room temperature! You would think that I would be used to it by now, but I guess that's what microwaves are for.(smile).
So as I made my way back to the kitchen to reheat my cup of"Joe" I put on my cute fluffy socks, ponytail holder, my pink head phones,"TURNED ALL THE WAY UP' to the maximum. So imagine this.... I'm strutting down the hall listening to a little JayZ's Blueprint(yeah I'm ol school) .... eyes closed, cup of coffee in my right hand, and the other hand on my hip doing the "milly rock"
READY TO GET THIS DAY STARTED
If only my assistant could see me now, she would probably join me in a twenty minute dance off.LOL. So back to the coffee. I put the coffee in the microwave but didn't set the timer, because I realized I needed to eat something, so I decided to make something a little different, so my mind started trying to be creative. I didn't want the same old breakfast that I prepare everyday so I decided to make some crepes. You may be wondering "crepes"? You have time to do all that, plus run a business, have meetings, make videos, and write?
YESSSSSSSS! I LOVE MY FOOD!
So here is what I made today people!
Aren't they beautiful? So here is a link so that you can make cool crepes too. I mean after all sharing is caring right?(lol)
Do you wanna hear something funny? I never did re-heat my coffee. I totally forgot that it was in the microwave!
.
GEESH!!
Well it was probably for the best.
So back to my desk..... .in my comfy chair, that leans back just right. I now have to get in the mood to talk about something that I cant wait to share with you guys. But first I have to turn off "HOV" and put on a little "Luther". Thats right a little Luther Vandross.
SO GET READY!..
Welcome to ADULT TALK WITH INSPIRATIONAL BEAUTY! #ADULTTALKWITHIB
So as I sit here listening to Luther, he is using that good ol' silky voice to talk about"Creepin". Now that's an entirely different topic from today's topic, but I promise you we will definitely visit that in future blogs,but today we are focusing on something that we all need help with from time to time.
Today we are focusing on "How To Keep Your Partner Interested"
You know, a couple of days ago I was on social media, and talking with a couple of you and asked you the question, and you had some really great ideas, and even deep thoughts concerning this mater. You know, so often we want things to change, but the problem is we don't know how to make those changes happern.
Well you are in luck. I'm not saying I have all the answers, but I can bring a little bit of objectivity to the situation. I'm just like many of you, I'm no stranger to trying to make my personal relationship work. I would often find myself mystified, because I thought I tried it all, but let me tell you something right now, none of us have TRIED IT ALL!
when you really desire something or someone, you try and do your best, and then and only then will you be able to walk way if you have to,
so why do we even care if our partner remains interested?
i believe it says a lot about you as a person to want to go deeper with that MAN.... with that WOMAN!
Getting their interest is easy, but maintaining and keeping it is a different story. You may be thinking you don't have time, things have changed, and you're just too exhausted.
Well, I don't want to put more on you, but lets just look at some simple things that can get you back on track. I'ts not the "cure all" for a relationship that may be ending, or on its last leg like a dying animal hit on the highway(smile) but for those that just want to spice things up a bit, these are some fun things you can do.
Before we get into it, lets look at why your partner may "believe" they are losing interest in the first place. So lets make it simple. Since I am a Coach I love "steps, tips and anything that I can put a number beside.(LOL)
So lets start with The Basics.
1.Partner Has Changed
2. Sex or Lack of Good Sex
3. Money
4. Effective Communication
Now for the sake of getting through this blog without creating a headache for you or myself, lets just stick with these four just on today. On Wednesday I promise we will continue with some things that are on the list that you may be unaware of. I am a person who loves to look at problems to try to understand them and come to some resolution if possible. Presenting the problem is just the first step, but it should never end there.
Are you ready to dive in?
Lets DIVE!
Challenge:PARTNER HAS CHANGED
1. We have all heard this one before, but I want to challenge this statement a little bit.Now most people may believe this means the individual has changed for the "worse. I want you to take a pause for about 15 seconds right here because changing for the better can also be a problem for some relationships.(will share on a later blog). But lets keep this simple right now. These are common scenarios, because all people will change at one point or another for different reasons. But some of the specific complaints are things like.....
" She doesn't clean anymore."
"She doesn't keep herself up anymore."
"She doesn't respect me anymore"
or
"He doesn't show me any attention anymore, or give me affection."
" He just wants sex,doesn't want to take me out anymore."
" We are not interested in the same things anymore."
So, if you are over the age of 18 you have either heard these before, or have stated them before.Lets start with the good news first. YOU ARE NOT ALONE(smile).
Every person in the world has felt like this at times whether they will ever admit it or not. Its so easy to judge one another . Especially those closest to us because we feel like we hold that "right" or "position" because being closest to them qualifies us to constantly remind each other of our short comings.
Ok... so the PERSON HAS CHANGED, or they're not doing what they used to do. What 'Im going to share next is really going to surprise you. There are only two reasons why any of us stop or start to do anything.
1. Pleasure or Pain
Ask yourself, when you first started dating, you did all these things to keep yourself up because it was going to net "You" some "PLEASURE." You see, we ladies get all dolled up because we like the way that it makes us feel and we like what we see, but we LOVE WHEN YOU NOTICE(pleasure)
As time goes on, some time life gets a little harder, and now we have kids, demanding jobs,crazy schedules, and now its "PAINFUL" to take time for ourselves because other things will get behind. (you know what IM talking about) . So what started off as fun, has now become a challenge, and the "partner" thinks you no longer care. that may be the case, because on the list or priorities it may have to take a back seat. it should.....
TEMPORARILY
Confusing?
Impossible to change back?
Not at all....
This is is where self care comes in.As our lives chanege we may have to rearrange some things but its important for your well being, and for your relationship.So here are a few suggestions.
SOLUTIONS;
1. When you see your partner no longer keeping themselves up, they are probably overwhelmed. Suggest a "TAKEOVER". You will then take over a duty or several duties for a 24 hour period, so they can recharge, doing something fun, or be pampered. The key is to NOT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER.
Make it fun and present a "TAKEOVER" coupon.
Try it, its fun, sexy and adds spice to any relationship.Now if your partner is very busy you may have to schedule this "TAKEOVER" so that it will work. Have fun.It can be a 24 hour period, 48 or 72, but the goal is to help them get back on track, and you get ALL THE BENEFITS!
You can Thank me NOW!
Now lets look at number 2.
Challenge: Sex or Lack Of Good Sex"
2. SEX is such a small word but such a REAL ISSUE FOR MOST RELATIONSHIPS! Lets visit this challenge. Sex can present challenges, and I choose to call it a challenge because that means that it can be conquered. That's great news. I don't really believe in problems, because it tells me something is impossible, so instead a "challenge" denotes things may be difficult but not Impossible to overcome.
My intention is not to get "overly" deep about sex because that's not the point we are going for in today's blog. But in every relationship sex is either stressed as a "NEED" or a "WANT', and depending on the relationship it can be either or even both.
But generally in every relationship there is one person who may express it as a NEED more than the other person, and that may cause some problems if not communicated in a positive way.. So you may hear things like this....
"She doesnt give it to me like I need it."
"I don't feel comfortable doing that with him."
" I need more variety to satisfy me"
"Its always the same, I do'nt even want it."
"I don't feel sexy anymore, I don't want to show him my body."
So some of these issues are with the individual not feeling adequate, and some of the other statements have to do with not feeling satisfied. So lets get to a solution on this one. It's very simple.....
SOLUTION:
2.COMMUNICATION.
Simple right?
I'm going to go a little deeper here, not only communicate your needs to your partner, but learn how to communicate your needs to yourself.You do that by accepting that you are beautiful, attractive, amazing, interesting, and deserved to be loved, That allows you to feel more comfortable with yourself and it provides a safe place for your partner .
Great love making is all about feeling safe for a woman. She must feel comfortable with her body, her emotions and that these things are reciprocated from her man. She must feel connected.
AMAZING Love Making for a man, he must feel like you are enjoying what he is offering. He wants to hear your excitement, he wants to feel your body move along with his. He wants to see your enjoyment. He will connect more physically and that will eventually translate to more emotions from him because he feels you trust him, and he can trust you as well.,
So here is a little exercise.
1 Men....,If you are desiring more intimacy and sex from your partner provide a safe place for them. So gentlemen, take her somewhere really nice and make it all about her. Also do something to focus on the little things,
A MUST GIVE HER ATTENTION, AFFECTION and ADORATION....
Doo a small scavenger hunt, and put a couple of items around the house or in the car of things that speak to her heart, and end the night with a nice foot massage or back rub, whisper in her ear she is the only one for you....... and Enjoy!
2. Women if you are desiring more intimacy in your love making from your Man, lead with CONFIDENCE,. don't be shy. Don't hold back on letting him know how much he pleases you, and how much you love him. Is this EGO STROKING? Yes....Men are simple, not stupid. Just simple. But you don't have to lay it on thick. CONFIDENCE and being uninhibited is enough to get him going and keep him interested. So when he comes home do the unexpected, Be creative! Enjoy
So lets talk about number "3"
3. Challenge: Money Issues
"Whoever has it, has control."
Is that a fair statement?
I would say there's a little bit of truth to it. Sohere we go. In America it is estimated that 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce, and one of the main issues is due to finance. You know.... MONEY...DINERO...CASH...CURRENCY....COINS.
When I was younger I always believed that as long as you had love, that there was nothing that you couldn't conquer.I still believe that to be true, but I had to understand the ways of the world. Now that I am more mature and look for more practical solutions, things have become a little easier. Mos of us get married or get into relationships because we love that other person, but we forget that apart of being able to grow as a unit we must have a plan for our money. (We will talk about "Money Matters" on another blog0, but for right now we want to see what we can do right now to change some things.
Some people don't believe that money or lack of it, or understanding it can cause a "riff" or loss of interest in a relationship. Not only can it,
IT WILL DESTROY A RELATIONSHIP IF NOT RESOLVED.
How will it affect interest or lack of interest from your partner?
Well money is an extension of your relationship. It is a way that we bring safety and security into our relationship as well as supplying needs and wants. This can affect every area of a relationship because money is the only form of currency in our modern world.There is no longer the "Barter" system. Everything from wants and needs have to be supplied with MONEY. Something that important needs a plan.
Sidenote:Its very attractive when A Man knows how to handle his money.
Have a conversation and listen to one another about your plans for your collective finances.
So Start by setting a time, date, and place to sit down at a coffee shop and go over your short term and long term goals where your money is concerned.
When you both come together, you are both putting value and respect on your present and your future. A person who values these things will help the relationship grow, and therefore the interest too.
So I believe we've covered enough today. As a matter of fact a lot of you have shared with me what you do to keep your partners interested. So check out the blog then to hear from some of you and what you had to say.. I cant wait.
Also check out who will be our featured guest right here on #AdultTalkWithIB none other than the Ms. Nicole Grays Owens #NIKO.... shes coming with the fire. if you dont know her now, you will . Beautiful, smart, funny and Stylists to the Stars. Lets see what shes up to.
Check out this week on our live radio show on # SimplyIB the Sophisticated and Amazing Maverick in Business and Personal Development. Mr Ruben West this Wednesday on #SimplyIB at 8 pm eastern or dial 845 241 9898
This Wednesday we will have a continuation of
HOW TO KEEP YOUR PARTNER INTERESTED.
To leave private comments or questions for #ADULTTALKWITHIB or #ASKIB, please email here. To learn more about Kimberly Arrington and her products, services, and offers please visit. I AM KIMBERLY ARRINGTON to catch her live radio broadcasts please subscribe here SimplyIb
TIME TO LEVEL UP.... This is Bahrain ....
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